Sex-Marriage

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Sex-Marriage

SEX, MARRIAGE, AND THE MISSING LINK

By Dr Evan S. Baltazzi

01/19/04

And God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And he blessed them. Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it (Gen. 1:27,28).

Humans are featherless biped animals, mammals set apart from other animal species by their physical characteristics and their powerful intellect. They stand erect and one of their fingers is in opposition to the others giving them unique manual dexterity. Humans like to think of themselves as rational beings, yet they are essentially emotional and some of them have spiritual leanings. Yet on the animal plane the survival of the specie is no different from that of all other animals and hinges on procreation. The drive to procreate is instinctive, strong and stimulated by the intense pleasure derived from it. While men are physically stronger than women, women are physiologically more durable and this is essential for the preservation of the specie. The morphology of the sexes is admirably functional and mutually attractive.

Most other animals have a season during which they feel an intense drive to procreate. Man has no such season. As farmers and hunters know the survival of any specie is hinging more on the number of females rather than that of males. Instinctively during grave danger men think of protecting women and children first. With his intellect man is able to dissociate the pleasure of the act of procreation from its intended purpose. The human young require much longer those of other mammals before becoming self-supporting.

Man is a social animal. The human society from being relatively simple has become throughout the centuries increasingly complex and demanding upon its members. In agrarian societies the roles of the two sexes were well defined. As the complexity of human society increased an overlap of the functions of both sexes within it became inevitable. The complementary sex became "opposite."

There is no question that women were exploited and in many countries they still are. One of the main reasons for the postwar Japanese "miracle" is cheap female labor. There is also no doubt that women are fully capable of assuming responsibilities earlier thought as the unique domain of man. Women can lead businesses, fly fighter jets, and become very successful in many professions. However, their natural destiny and function is the reproduction of the specie and this will never change as long as humans exist. Fathers are needed, but the relationship of mother to child is unique and irreplaceable.

In today's society the stability of the family is in serious jeopardy. One may divorce his or her spouse but the relationship of parents to children and of siblings among themselves is forever an unbreakable bond. Skyrocketing divorce rates, teenage pregnancies, mothers out of wedlock, single parents, divorced or not, are the reason for many dysfunctional families. People who themselves are sexually satisfied urge the young to just say: "no," while the media expose them to an avalanche of sex related material to boost sales. Since the family is the fundamental building block of any human society, this unbalance is at the root of psychologically traumatized people, escapism with the use of chemical substances, increased crime, much mental illness with all the societal problems they cause in a vicious circle.

The answer to these serious problems is a stable family. Initially men and women are attracted to each other on the physical plane, but if this is all that keeps them together the bond will not last. If the initial falling in love does not evolve into a more sublime feeling made out of mutual respect, affection, tenderness, and the will to give and to give in, no marriage will last and the children, young or even grown up will be hurt. Like a surgical operation, divorce is sometimes necessary but leaves a scar. Children belong to both parents and cannot tear themselves apart.

True love is a fragile flower that needs to be sheltered and nurtured, Husbands who love their wives should not express their love only three times a year on Valentine's Day, on their anniversary, and on their wife's birthday; they should not take it for granted that their wives know they love them. The French say "A woman one loves is forever beautiful," that is love withstands the ravages of time on the physique. Husbands should tell their wives they love them every day of the week and twice on Sundays. Wives, who know how to express their love and affection to their children in a myriad ways, should do the same for their husbands. When one starts thinking of himself first, he ceases to love and then the problems start. The most precious gift from parents to their children is their devoted love for each other.

"Love is patient and kind, love is not jealous and boastful, and it is not arrogant and rude. Love does not insist on its own way, it is not irritable, resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Love never ends "1 Cor. 13: 4-8

This is the missing link.

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